... And then there were two.

A and I spent last night curled up together in our bed, spooning and canoodling and...*coughcough* anyway... like we did in the glorious, early days of our relationship. It was great. What was missing from this picture?

Our daughter.

Yes... the Punky has been expelled from our family bed. Contrary to popular belief, she does indeed have her own room, complete with crib, and this is the current scene in that crib:




It's kind of bittersweet, to be honest. I mean, sure, I missed cuddling with my husband in bed. But much to my amazement, I missed not having tiny little feet lodged in my ribs. I missed little hands pawing for my boob and I really, REALLY missed having a little noggin snuggled in my armpit. She seems to be adjusting much better than I am. Our evening ritual has turned to rocking for about 45 minutes, watching TV and having a goodnight boob, and then I carefully, so very, very FREAKING carefully, lay her in her crib, turn on her crib "aquarium", turn on the monitor (which is actually being used for the first time), and quietly tip-toe out, threatening the dog with his life if he even remotely considers the mere possibility of barking at anything.

(Seriously. For the first time ever, I hissed through my teeth at my dog: "I swear to God I WILL KILL YOU.")

While I'm glad that I can finally rest a little easier, not frantically waking up and checking to make sure she's still breathing (you name the SIDS risk, this kid enjoys it with GUSTO), I'm a little sad that she's adjusted so eagerly to her own crib. You're supposed to WAIL, kid! You're supposed to miss me, yearn for my armpit and my motherly scent, the closeness of the all-powerful boob! Now wake up, right now, and MISS ME, DAMNIT!!!

I feel like a totally selfish asshole for thinking that. I should be thankful, oh so very thankful, that my kid is such a good sleeper. And I am. I just miss having her sleep with us. But for all intensive purposes, it really is the best for everyone involved, and the longer I put off switching her to her own crib, the harder it's going to get. So I just need to suck it up and deal. Seriously -- how dare I have an infant who is abnormally well-behaved, low-maintenance, sweet and funny AND a good sleeper.

Too bad, though... I'd always keep her in bed between me and A if I didn't feel like having half-awake middle-of-the-night sex. Babies are a good and useful cock block. Not that we had sex if she was on the other side of me, either. No. We definitely didn't have sex with her in the bed ,that's what bad parents do...

... but do you think she'd develop emotional issues later on in life if we did have sex with her in the bed? I mean, I'm not saying we did, but just hypothetically?